About Us
By the Department of Pet Nutrition
These individuals are wanted for crimes against boring pet food.
Tries to be Gordon Ramsay. Deep down he's a goof. Owns the final meal prep and cooking steps.
Prep Puppy
- Excessive enthusiasm in the kitchen
- Unauthorized taste testing (all ingredients)
- Impersonating Gordon Ramsay (poorly)
- Possession of illegal levels of flavor
“I can explain! I was just making sure it was PAWFECT. It's not a crime to care too much about food quality.”
Nerdy, scatterbrained, and brilliant. Explains nutrition logic and standards without the fluff.
Professor Purfessor
- Illegal possession of 47 degrees (it is actually just one)
- Misdemeanor tangent-going in the first degree
- Aggravated nutrition nerding
- Grand theft of your attention during explanations
“This is preposterous! By definition a 'crime' is— wait, where are my glasses? Oh. Right. Continue.”
Stoic, cold, mopey. Discovers ingredients, curates meals, and keeps the standards uncomfortably high.
Sherlock Shells
- Excessive skepticism of 'premium' labels
- Aggravated side-eye
- Investigation without a warrant (your pantry)
- Grand theft of your subpar ingredients
“I've committed no crime—unless you count exposing mediocre ingredients masquerading as quality. In that case, guilty.”
ADHD and jovial. Farms the ingredients, celebrates freshness, and gets distracted by… everything.
Harvest Hamster
- Farming without a chill permit
- Reckless enthusiasm
- Possession of seventeen carrot varieties (only needed one)
- Talking at 385 WPM in a 25 WPM zone
“OHMYGOSH AM I IN TROUBLE?! Is this about the carrots?! Because I can explain each variety—wait, are those handcuffs?!”
Talkative and stubborn. Delivers ingredients to you whether the weather agrees or not.
Robin RedRoute
- Arguing with GPS (and winning)
- Unauthorized route optimization
- Excessive opinions on porch placement
- Refusing to accept 'delay' as an answer
“This is ridiculous! I'm still delivering your ingredients on time. I have standards. Are we done here?”
OKAY OKAY… we had some fun.
Scroll for the real About Us.
Real food for pets shouldn’t be confusing.
Pet Plates helps you plan homemade pet meals with clarity, structure, and safety — without pretending to replace your vet.
Pet Plates is a learning project. We test ideas about ingredient safety, nutrition guardrails, and how to make meal planning more transparent.
- •We prioritize clarity over hype
- •We don’t hide edge cases
- •We show our assumptions
We take pet food seriously — but not ourselves.
What Pet Plates is (and is not)
What Pet Plates is
- •A meal-planning tool for homemade pet food
- •A safety-first ingredient and nutrition guide
- •A starting point for informed pet owners
- •A way to understand what goes into the bowl
What Pet Plates is not
- •Not a veterinary service
- •Not a diagnosis or treatment tool
- •Not a replacement for professional care
- •Not a guarantee of medical outcomes
Always consult a licensed veterinarian for medical conditions, allergies, or long-term diet decisions.
Why this exists
Pet owners want to do better, but commercial food labels are confusing and online advice can be contradictory — or flat-out unsafe.
Homemade food shouldn’t require a nutrition degree. Pet Plates exists to make thinking clearly about ingredients, portions, and tradeoffs easier.
We’re not here to sell miracles. We’re here to give you structure, guardrails, and straightforward explanations you can actually use.
How recipes are created
- 1.Species + basic profile
- 2.Ingredient safety screening
- 3.Nutrition guardrails applied
- 4.Portion logic for real kitchens
- 5.Final sanity checks
Standards are used as guidance, not prescriptions.
Edge cases trigger warnings, not silent failures.
Safety & responsibility
- •Ingredient bans for known toxic foods
- •Conservative assumptions when data is uncertain
- •Clear warnings for red-flag ingredients and edge cases
- •Encouragement to double-check with professionals
Who this is for (and not for)
For
- •Curious, cautious pet owners
- •People considering homemade food
- •Owners who want to understand ingredients
Not for
- •Emergency situations
- •Medical treatment plans
- •Anyone looking for “miracle diets”
User Agreement Disclaimer
User Agreement Disclaimer:
Pet Plates is designed for informational and educational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or replace professional veterinary advice. Always consult your veterinarian for any health-related questions or concerns about your pet. By continuing to use this site, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.